April 3, 2012

When Life Seasons Change

It's crazy to me how life can be so full of changes and yet, I crave changes in season. I'm not a person that could live where it's the same temperature all year. I need that switch. The nudge that something new is coming; the first bulb showing me that winter has ended and something different is about to begin.

This weekend felt like that to me. After grueling days of sadness, the funeral came on Friday morning. It was a beautiful celebration of one powerful life lived. I went home weary. We'd planned to go to a retreat with friends this weekend, but I found myself dragging my feet on packing. I didn't think I could switch gears, didn't know if I'd be weepy all weekend and spoil the time for everyone else.

Finally I managed it. My kids were excited we were on the road again. And as we drove up the path to where the cabins were, I stared into the forest. I grew up surrounded by trees like this. Not only was the green there to remind me things can start over after a long winter, but the white dogwood trees reminded me of something deeper.

Friday night was full of games and laughter. It was a sweet relief after all the heaviness. I went to bed early for me and slept late into the next day. Thankfully, I wasn't the only one. It was what I needed and I felt so refreshed. In the afternoon, everyone at the retreat agreed to spend two hours in silence as an experiment. I didn't realize how much I'd missed silence. Sitting under the trees listening to leaves falling and the birds chirping their songs; I felt my shoulders physically relax. The breeze seemed to hold God's breath. Something was there I hadn't expected, comfort...peace.

I found strength again. A turn of season reminding me that hope stands ahead. I don't have to rush my grief.


  1. oh Catherine
    this is so beautiful
    such a perfect thing to do after an emotionally heavy time
    i am so glad you went
    love the 2 hours of silence you did....how perfect
    thank you for sharing this

    love and light

  2. I'm catching up on some blog reading. I am sorry for the loss of your friend. Silence is a great healer.

  3. Such beautiful depth to this post. I've always found nature to be healing. You're right about the regeneration and renewal that can be found and about the peace in natural quiet. Hugs and more peace to you, my dear.

  4. Beautiful Catherine! I'm sorry to hear that you had to experience another loss. Lots of thoughts coming your way. :) I have one of your postcards on my fridge so I think of you everyday!!! haha

  5. Beautiful post, Catherine. I'm glad to hear you are finding comfort, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
    My mother-in-law died last month at age 60...it's hard to see the change of spring without her, because she loved it so much. But I know that's my own lack of faith causing those thoughts...she is probably enjoying it in Heaven more than I can here!

  6. This post gave me goosebumps! Gorgeously written and I'm so happy that such a rough week ended well, with hope and peace.


  7. This said it all: "hope stands ahead". Hang in there.

  8. Sounds like that's just the kind of change you needed. Sorry for your loss. Glad you found comfort.

    Play off the Page

  9. Wow! This moved me to tears. I could literally feel with you all along the way. I think the being out with silence and Him and nature, is beautiful. So sweet to remind you in such a dear way! loved this!


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