Happier Ever After?

I love happy endings. I like fairy tales, but I don't like how they create a false reality. Before hubby and I got married, we were counseled a lot. They told us that marriage was work. And even though I nodded my head, I didn't believe them. How could it be work to love someone? *insert laughter here*

Love, no matter how starry-eyed, is work. It's sacrifice and letting go. It's forgiveness and hope. It's wading through hard conversations until you work things out. It's realizing life isn't all about you. It's putting your preferences on hold to defer to someone else's. It's continuing to care even when the butterflies have a day off. It's choosing kind words when you want to spit and patience when you want to slam doors. It's walking alongside when you're not sure where the road goes. It's cleaning the kitchen when you'd rather take a nap. It's listening when you're mind is racing. It's reaching for his hand when your day's been hard too.

I think the truth about love isn't told enough. I consider my marriage to be a strong one, but we still argue. We don't date as often as we should. We get caught up in "kid talk" instead of sharing our hearts. We still hurt each other in deep ways. We sometimes get it so wrong even after all these years. But...

He can make me laugh harder than anyone. He knows how deep I love our kids because he does too. He knows my angry face and when to steer clear. I know when he needs to decompress. He gets my art. I get his football. We hope the best for each other. We both screw it up sometimes.

Love is not all good or all bad. It's both. It's difficult and sweet. And despite what fairy tales say, no one lives happily ever after . . .

Maybe, just happier.

Stop, Sit and Listen

Memaw's back at my house this week. She sits in her familiar spot reading and resting. This time I knelt down next to her, reading a picture book like I did last time she visited and afterwards, just sat there. I didn't say anything. I didn't rush to get something done. I smiled at her and waited.

She sat quiet for a few minutes, then began to talk. She asked me about some items sitting in the room. "Do you sew on that machine?" she asked. I admitted I haven't sewn much. "Who's coat is that? It's pretty." I explained it was my husband's.

She paused for a long time. Usually, that's my cue to get up. But this time I decided to just wait and see what happened. In a bit, she started talking again. She told me stories of her childhood. Some I'd heard many times and others I didn't remember. I listened. She paused again for a long time, and then just like before, started talking again. She asked me about my kids (in the adjoining room) and my husband; she even inquired after his mother. This interaction went on for over an hour--the longest conversation since I started helping with her. It felt like we were in the past, visiting. Slower, but steady.

She finally did tire and reached for her Bible. But I noticed for the rest of the evening, she wore a faint smile. It reminded me of when I've had an outing with a friend or quality time with my husband; I find myself smiling as I go about my work.

I mulled it over and thought about all those times she's come to my house when I've been busy, in a hurry, or too rushed to wait. Isn't that how we are? We rush, we hurry, we run past things that matter.

As the days have passed, I've continued paying attention. I now see what I missed before. She wants to talk, I just didn't listen long enough. I wasn't giving her the time it takes for her to process. I was rushing a slowed-down mind in my hurry-up world. I'm thankful for her presence to remind me to soak in each moment; to stop, sit and listen.

Doghouse Kingdom

I didn't get a final picture so there are a few tweaks that aren't in this photo, but this is very close to the painting I gave my brother. When he opened it, he burst out laughing, along with my sister sitting beside him. I couldn't help laughing myself at the surprise on his face at seeing his dog-babies dressed as royalty. When he hugged me, he whispered, "It's perfect." I was excited to give him a piece of my heart on canvas and then to see it connect in such a tender way; I can't describe how amazing that felt.

I've been contemplating unique ways to use art for Christmas. Do you give handmade gifts for Christmas? Any cool ideas you'd like to share?

Thankful for You!

This beautiful arrangement sits in my parent's home.

I am so thankful for each of you sweet souls who come to my blog and take the time to read and interact with me. It means more than I can express. I hope you'll take this offering of gratefulness to heart; you are a great source of beauty in this one simple life.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Much Love Monday: Polka Dots and Ruffles

Sweater and shirt: Thrift

Earrings: Gift 
Belt: Plato's Closet

Hairclips: Dollar Jewelry Store

Painting: Mine (print available here)

What I'm loving today:

• Ruffles on this green sweater and polka-dot blouse.
• A quick up-do when I'm running late.
• Decorative clips--my new favorite accessory.
• Hearing my grandma's voice as she reads. She's staying with us for a few days to give my parents a little break. She doesn't talk much anymore so hearing her read-aloud is extra special and heartwarming.
• That my daughter attempted sewing while I was out. Now I know my suspicions were right, she does want to learn to sew!
• I've been able to organize my way through three more drawers and a box.
• That today is the beginning of a new week.

What are you loving today?