October 2, 2018

The Compelling Reason Why

I've questioned why there are times I can commit and nothing can keep me from completing that commitment. Then other times I commit and within that same day, I bail. In those moments I struggle with feeling like a quitter.

But deep in my core, I know that's not true.

So why? Why do I quit some goals and stay firmly committed to others? I was listening to Brooke Castillo's podcast today and she explained that to be committed to something you need a compelling reason why. I've heard this before when I was in an MLM, they talked about needing to have a why to make it all the way. But at the time, I just thought it was mental gymnastics and trying to guilt yourself into doing something.

But Brooke explained it in a way that helped me understand more clearly. The compelling reason why has to be in direct contrast to the reason that you're not doing it now. So say I want to exercise consistently, but the reason I don't is because I'm too afraid of looking stupid. Looking stupid is winning, it's more compelling to me than my reason to exercise. In fact, it's making me committed to NOT to exercise. So until I figure out a compelling reason to overcome that "I look stupid" thought, I won't be able to commit and really follow through.

Looking back, the times I followed through, I had very compelling reasons. For example, I stopped eating meat a year and a half ago. I had never entertained the idea of not eating meat because I liked meat. But one book changed that! It shifted my thinking. My compelling reason became compassion, I couldn't contribute to the pain of animals anymore. (I'm not trying to convince you to not eat meat, it's a personal reason for me and I respect your right to do as you feel best.) BUT, that one reason "not contributing to the pain of animals" compelled me enough to overcome a lifetime of eating meat.

On the other hand, I have wanted to build a personal online business for almost ten years but have never done it. Why? My compelling reason for not doing it has been, "It's too hard". So in order to overcome, "it's too hard", I need to have something to motivate me which will eliminate my desire to abandon it.

I'm not sure what that compelling reason will be, but I've been working on it. I'm considering using one of the most consistent and biggest (vain) motivators in my life. The one thought that always seems to make me rise to the occasion:

"I was right!"

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